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Funny Love Quotes

*You say I'm always happy, and that I'm good at what I do, but what you'll never realize is, I'm a damn good actress too*

*Valentine's day is only in existence to pour lemon juice on the paper cut hearts of the unattached.*

*Mr. Right's coming. But he's in Africa... and he's walking.*

*You take the 'L' out of lover and it's over*

*Love is a sensation, caused by temptation when a guy sticks his location in a girls destination to increase the population for the next generation. Do you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?*

*I'm not kissing you, I'm whispering in your mouth!*

*You love somebody and then you don't love them anymore. But if you really love somebody, you always love them, don't you? Isn't there always some small part of you that still reads their horoscope in the paper everyday?*

*They say love hides behind every corner. Well, I guess I must be walking in circles.*

*Girls play at sex to get love and guys play at love to get sex. *

"A heart is not a play thing. A heart is not a toy.
But if you want it broken, then give it to a boy."

A girl is much more than she seems,
Not a toy by any means,
Underneath her make-up and hair is a sign saying "Handle with care."

They say true love is worth fighting for, but if its true love..why do you have to fight for it?

Love is like a tug of war, one jerk after another

When you trip over love you can get right back up, but when you fall in love, you're down forever

*A man loses his sense of direction after four beers...a women loses hers after four kisses *

"A broken heart is what makes life so wonderful five years later, when you see the guy on the elevator and he is fat and smoking a cigar and saying long- time- no -see.If he hadent broken your heart, you could'nt have that glorious feeling of relief..."

Love is when you've ran out of excuses for hating someone.

Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.-Albert Einstein

"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous."

"Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell."
-- Joan Crawford

"Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun."
-- Matt Groening, Love is Hell

"If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?"
-- Lily Tomlin

"You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it."
-- Henny Youngman

You have to kiss a lot of toads before you find a handsome prince.

They have come up with a perfect understanding. He won't try to run her life, and he won't try to run his, either.

In the blithe days of honeymoon,
With Kate's allurements smitten,
I lov'd her late, I lov'd her soon,
And call'd her dearest kitten.
But now my kitten's grown a cat,
And cross like other wives.
O! By my soul my honest Mat,
I fear she has nine lives.
-- James Boswell, Life of Johnson

~He's the cutest, sweetest, nicest, greatest, most romantic, most insensitive jerk I have ever met~

I love him yes i do he's for me and not for you, if by chance you take my place, I'll take my fist and smash your face.

~*I know i'm crazy about someone when i take a longer way to class...even if it means climbing an extra set of stairs, just to walk by him.

~*I can live without you, i just don't want to.

*Snow White. Cinderella. All about wanting a guy, being saved by the guy. Today it's Little Mermaid, Aladdin, Pocahontas. All about getting a guy. So basically we're screwed up because of Disney.

~*He loves me, he loves me not. Either way my heart's been caught.

~*Starlight starbrite where the hell is mr.right?

~*Do you see her face? Girls like that are born with a boyfriend.

~*Love is like some cosmic practical joke that someone up there with absolutely no sense of humor thinks is funny.

~*Men are living proof that women can take a joke.

**They say kissing is the language of to indulge in a little conversation**

Love is a hoax. our emotions are all provoked by chemical reactions. it creates this euphoria that makes you stupid. it's all biochemistry.

all romantics are simply addicts
"Love is a lot like a rhino, short-sighted and hasty. If it cannot find a way, it will make a way."

"Is there a cure for a broken heart? Only time can heal your broken heart, Just as time can heal his broken arms and legs" ~ Miss Piggy

Dawson: "When a girl hates you the way Andie hates you, it really means that she likes you. That's basic kindergarten psychology."

"The most horrible thing that can happen to you in life is to be without love, toilet paper coming to a close second..."

** I want a boyfriend who's sensitive, caring, talented and smart...but they already have boyfriends!!**

You can't make someone love you
you can only stalk them and hope they'll panic and give in. = )

Love is grand; Divorce is a hundred grand.

*It's not my fault I fell for you...You tripped me!*

Im sweet like SUGA
Soft like SUADE

Just like I have learned to deal w/ the fact that Santa Claus isn't
real...I have also learned to deal w/ the fact that neither are
those guys in fairy tales!

One day your prince will come, mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is to stubborn to ask for directions

"See Dick get girl, see Dick use girl, see Dick lose girl, DON'T BE A DICK."

he broke my heart, so i broke his jaw

"I am Leaving...I am walking out that door...and I am never coming back...But Just in case.....Can you just lock your door?"

I lost my favorite teddy bear that i sleep with so can i have you for tonight or forever?

"Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves."

"Whenever I go on a date, I think to myself, is this the guy I want my kids to spend their weekends with?"

Miscellaneous Love Quotes 4

Marriage Quotes